March 20, 2005

Scenes from my driveway, continued x 54

Deadbeat neighbor:  “Good morning! Happy first day of spring to you!”

Me: “Is it spring already?  Wow.  Where does the time go?”

Deadbeat neighbor:  “Well, uh…

Me: “– That was a rhetorical question.”

Deadbeat neighbor:  “Oh. Whew!  Thank goodness.”

Me:

Deadbeat neighbor

Me:

Deadbeat neighbor:  “Er, what’s a rhetorical question again…?”

Me: “Skip it.  Say, is that my newspaper…?”

Posted by Jeff G. @ 4:25pm
16 comments | Trackback

Comments (16)

  1. Deadbeat Neighbour: “Yeah, well, I’m not the one who’s asking questions I don’t want an answer to.”

  2. Deadbeat Neighbor: Why do Jews always answer a question with another question, anyway?

    Jeff: Do we?

  3. - Update on “Patriot Picnic – San Diego”. The local version of the “Workers Daily” that shamelessly passes itself off as a “newspaper”, the San Diego Union, ran its typical hyperama version of the festive gala. “1000-plus decry Iraq war at Balboa park” read the headline. I was there twice briefly at the beginning and near the end of the “rally”, and if there were 1000+ zepher zombies in attendence they must have been disguised as lamp posts or fire hydrants. As you get into the article, which includes multiple quotes from the few moonbats they could actually find or talk to by phone, the cited numbers swell downwards toward the average temperature of Nova Scotia. Absolutely nada mention of the rational human beings in attendence who came close to equalling the true number of around a hundred or so on each side. The article tryed gamely to soften the blow to the moonbeam pteradactyl’s egos by mentioning the numbers cited were stretched over a 40 mile route. Since they never managed to outnumber even the cops I’m assuming the rest of them got stuck in I-5 traffic.

    word up: against – I’m not against same-sex abortion….

  4. Jeff: I’d appreciate it if you didn’t bring up my ethnicity.

    Deadbeat Neighbor: Well, I’m not the one who answered a question with a question.

  5. Jeff: “– That was a rhetorical question.”

    Deadbeat Neighbor: “Oh… well I dont know much about ‘rhetoricals’ but I bet if you Google it you can find something.

    Jeff:

    Deadbeat Neighbor: “Hey, mind if I ask something?”

    Jeff: “Whatever. Ya. Go ahead..”

    Deadbeat Neighbor: “Welp.. there’s some talk going ‘round the neighborhood that youre one of them Jewish secret spy guys..you know, like from Israel.. Is that true?

    Jeff: “…Mossad? Me ? No..no..no.. I dont know what youre talking about. Heh, I’m not even Jewish.. uhh. Oh, look at the time..where does the time go ?  I’ve got to go.. I’ll be late for Mass… at my Catholic Church.. where I’m supposed to be taking communion right now.. no time to talk.. See ya.”

    Deadbeat Neighbor: “Oh hey ! Did you want your paper?”

    Jeff: Nooo.. Keep it.. thats cool..

  6. “Frankly, my dear, do I give a damn?” – Rhett oracle question.

  7. Oh man, JW!  That one almost hurt!

  8. Have you been saving that one, JW?

  9. Deadbeat Neighbor: Hey, I hear your friend Gail has a new blog.

    Jeff: Yeah, it’s a little artsy-fartsy for my tastes.  When she starts including cut, 8” cocks, I might start going over there more.  Talk about your literature…

  10. Big Bang Hunter,

    Your time would have been better spent watching the demonstrators over at Black’s Beach.. Those poseur neo-hippy anti-war chicks are a whole lot more entertaining without their clothes. At least I think so…

    Turing word: senseThats what I mean, more pleasing to the senses.

    p.s. does Roberto’s still make the best Carne Asada burrito in the known world?

    -AB (once of La Jolla, now cold rainy Seattle)

  11. Artsy fartsy my buttsy wuttsy.

  12. THANK YOU, Gail–no better comment to be made…

  13. “Why can’t you ride in the elevator on Saturday?”, he asked again.

    A re-Torah-cal question.

  14. Hi Lyndsey. Was that you over at my site? Goyische Guy, are you sure you aren’t JWebb in disguise?

  15. - yeh maybe…. but the parking lot tar coated feet, and the even worse berkenstocks, are sort of a rip down to the whole package if you know what I mean….Besides I’m not into armpit follage….

  16. You Jews are hilarious people.  Like Seinfeld.

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