July 9, 2012

The Lapsed Prude’s confession haiku, 2

During the summer

I ogle in good conscience.

Because, well, tube tops.

 

Posted by Jeff G. @ 10:20am
26 comments | Trackback

Comments (26)

  1. Squid says July 9, 2012 at 10:48 am

    The first glance is just
    Recognition of God’s work;
    The second is sin.

  2. sdferr says July 9, 2012 at 10:56 am

    Or an honest (and fulfilling) intention, depending on whom the glance is cast. Hi honey!

  3. RI Red says July 9, 2012 at 10:59 am

    A picture is worth a thousand words. Especially if they are haiku.

  4. Blake says July 9, 2012 at 11:03 am

    My favorite, though, is the gal who’s wearing a low cut and revealing blouse with a very light wrap. You work your butt off maintaining eye contact, and what does the gal inevitably do? She moves her hands and pulls her wrap to cover her breasts. Thereby making it almost impossible to maintain eye contact.

  5. TaiChiWawa says July 9, 2012 at 11:04 am

    She wanted respect.
    I respect your frontal lobes.
    She knew what I meant.

  6. dicentra says July 9, 2012 at 11:15 am

    Ladies: If you don’t want to be ogled, cast not your pearls before swine.

    Cover ‘em up or deal with the consequences. I don’t care how hot it is.

  7. LBascom says July 9, 2012 at 11:19 am

    I’m like Bear Baloo
    Forget about those, they ain’t
    nothing but trouble

  9. BigBangHunter says July 9, 2012 at 11:54 am

    The boys of summer

    Ogle the girls in tube tops

    Beach jam here we go

  10. dicentra says July 9, 2012 at 11:54 am

    Mostly that was a comment on moronic feminists who assert that, “I should be able to wear a raw cow leg around my neck while

    “• swimming in croc/shark-infested waters
    “• traversing the savannah near a pride of lions
    “• traipsing through a jungle full of tigers

    “without being attacked.”

    Of course you should, sweetie. You go right on ahead and test that assumption.

  11. palaeomerus says July 9, 2012 at 12:05 pm

    And of course the men who glance at boobs, the men who stare at boobs, and the men who follow boobs around and try to drag them into an alley need not be distinguished from one another. All dangerous animal scum. Hit the wimp in the hope that the monster will feel it because the wimp probably won’t hit back. Wimps merely exists to absorb any anger generated by the monsters. And if the wimps don’t buy into this tell them that they are monsters even though they don’t do what the monsters do, and you’d NEVER call the monsters what they are to their face.

  12. BigBangHunter says July 9, 2012 at 12:15 pm

    - Women may be uncomfortable at times when men ogle them, but they would be manically distraught 24/7 if men ignored them.

  13. palaeomerus says July 9, 2012 at 12:19 pm

    Sometimes I think the monsters are actually in charge and that everybody wants it that way. Roman Polanski was a monster. But Whoopi Goldberg who is supposedly a woman and on the side of all women, said it wasn’t rape rape and suggested he was a victim of demented Christian prudes and that he should be allowed to come back to the US and not worry about persecution. She also said that following the US Constitution was written would resurrect slavery. She’s rich and famous. She chose who she likes and who she doesn’t. She chose the monsters. She still punches the wimps any chance she gets. It really makes me wonder about how we even form a society together sometimes.

  14. Squid says July 9, 2012 at 12:25 pm

    But does she have a nice rack?

  15. BigBangHunter says July 9, 2012 at 12:29 pm

    - Society is built on boobies, not monsters.

  16. charlesaustin says July 9, 2012 at 2:39 pm

    Tube tops top topping tubers.

    That is all.

  18. sdferr says July 9, 2012 at 2:52 pm

    Two nice racks.

  19. McGehee says July 9, 2012 at 3:58 pm

    My dictionary defines a rack as a tool for displaying a sweater to great advantage.

  20. dicentra says July 9, 2012 at 5:47 pm

    Women may be uncomfortable at times when men ogle them, but they would be manically distraught 24/7 if men ignored them.

    When I first got to Colombia, I was incensed by the custom of echando piropos, wherein men mutter compliments (or otherwise) at women they pass on the street. I even stopped long enough to tell a couple of them to have some respect for women as soon as I had enough Spanish to do so.

    Months later, if I didn’t hear the piropos, I was tempted to stop and demand whether there were something wrong with how we looked.

    That said, I’m glad Latino men haven’t generalized this custom to anglo chicks in the U.S. It actually is pretty sexist, and not in a good way.

  21. leigh says July 9, 2012 at 6:20 pm

    You’re kidding, right? When I lived in California it was “Mama-cita! all the live long day.

  22. RI Red says July 9, 2012 at 6:49 pm

    Johninfirestone, I think the answer to the question is, “Because they stare back at me.”

  23. Patrick Chester says July 9, 2012 at 6:52 pm

    Two words: Peripheral vision.

    ;-)

  25. charlesaustin says July 9, 2012 at 8:30 pm

    It’s all fun and games until someone loses an eye.

  26. Mike LaRoche says July 10, 2012 at 10:01 am

    Where’s pdbuttons? His haiku and avatar would be a perfect fit for this thread.

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