Chris, over at Beth’s My Vast Right Wing Conspiracy, reports on a story that I’d seen but neglected a couple of weeks back:
I’m still trying to figure this one out. A drunk woman and her husband are at the Minnesota-Iowa football game. She has to pee. I’m guessing the conversation started this way: “Hey honey, I’m going to the bathroomâ€Â. “Ok, see you in a fewâ€Â. She staggers to the top of the stairs and stumbles into the men’s room. Now most women would say “Wow, I’m so drunk, sorry guys.†I don’t know how many would say, “Well hell, I’m here. Y’all look good. Why don’t you come over here and do me hard in the handicap stall.†Or let’s say she was sweet talked by a guy. How many would stay in the men’s room long enough to be sweet talked into intercourse in the stall?
I can just imagine the cops: “Excuse me, sir, but will you come with us?”
“Why? I haven’t done anything to anyone!”
“Errrrr, no. But your wife has.”
Whether it’s funny or not, and if so, in what way, I leave to your judgments.
Related: “Here we go a-swaffelen among the leaves so green . . .”
Comment by Cowboy on 12/20 @ 9:00 am #
Because I sense that in some way my watching is affecting the outcome, sometimes, when my team is doing poorly, I’ll turn off the TV.
Let the record show, however, that–as sick as I am–I have never considered sex in a public restroom might help the Colts win.
Comment by urthshu on 12/20 @ 9:20 am #
Oh, jeez. This is every drunk blonde joke in a row…
Blonde mating call: “I’m soooo drunk!”
What does a drunk blonde do after sex? The next guy in line!
etc.
Comment by Lost My Cookies on 12/20 @ 10:07 am #
This is all Busch’s fault.
Comment by serr8d on 12/20 @ 11:26 am #
C2H5OH related..
I’d definitely be in jail. After buying a properly locking door..
Comment by Carin -buried under 10 inches of "climate change" on 12/20 @ 12:48 pm #
Not funny, dude. Are you a psychopath or som’in?
Comment by serr8d on 12/20 @ 1:04 pm #
Which major dude, do tell?
Comment by ccoffer on 12/20 @ 2:38 pm #
I think it reads like a romantic fairy tale. Makes me wanna go to a football game and hang out in the bathroom, I tell ya’ whut.
Comment by Rusty on 12/20 @ 2:46 pm #
as sick as I am–I have never considered sex in a public restroom might help the Colts win.
Couldn’t hurt.
Comment by daleyrocks on 12/20 @ 3:32 pm #
Makes you kinda wonder what goes on in the bathrooms at Lions games. Whatever it is hasn’t helped either.
Comment by Bob Reed on 12/20 @ 4:14 pm #
“Here’s Chris’ take on it. If she had not been stopped, she would have finished, maybe do a couple more and then she would have gone right back to hubby with him none the wiser. I’m betting this wasn’t her first ’stagger by humping’“.
Sadly, I agree with Chris. This probably wasn’t her first, ahem, <rendezvous…Cheaters never prosper, in the long run, and eventually get caught…
Where I do disagree with Chris is his favorable babe rating of her based on a photo…
She wasn’t all that to me, but I guess that’s subjective, and irrelevant when you’re talkin’ about folks who would do it in a public restroom…
Still, she’s no looker, but might be able to get a job that rhyme’s with that word..!
Comment by panther girl on 12/20 @ 6:55 pm #
She’d have to not forget to get the money afterwards though…
Comment by Kimberly on 12/21 @ 3:38 pm #
OK, not to to play Devil’s Advocate here, but if in fact she was so drunk that she has no recollection of the events, what was her husband doing while she was getting completely blitzed? Was he out of his mind on booze, too? Or was the marriage already so bad that he didn’t care that his shiatfaced wife had to stagger around a crowded place full of strangers to find the bathroom?
Of course, she’s responsible for what she drinks – but the few times I’ve ever gotten drunk around my husband, he’s kept a close eye on me. Something tells me that marriage already sucks, and what happened in the bathroom, while vile, might be better than what was going on in the marriage.
Comment by Dan Collins on 12/21 @ 3:42 pm #
I don’t know, Kimberly. I figure her husband was too hammered to appreciate how hammered she was. Evidently, she’s a blackout drinker. I believe her when she says that she doesn’t have any recollection of heading for the john or boinking the dude.
But I do agree that if the two of them consumed that much alcohol around a football game, at their age, that they’re pretty screwy.