Having spent part of my morning watching MSNBC in the breakfast room at a Residence Inn in Salisbury — a 20-minute session that, as a complement to scrambled eggs and turkey sausage, included interviews with Tim Russert, Robert Wexler (D-FL), Dan Rather, and a lot of proto-hagiographizing of Scott McClellan (at one time rumored by lefty activists to be a closet homosexual and self-hating gay man living a fetid lie, most likely BECAUSE OF THE HYPOCRISY) — I have come to the conclusion that, all things considered, I’d rather be eating fried dough and watching for mullets and Lynyrd Skynyrd chain wallets without my shirt on.
So, if anybody needs me, try one of the benches near Talbot street, or maybe the bar at the Purple Moose Saloon, where I’ll be sidling up and showing off my new airbrush tattoo of Barack Obama in a leopard-skin thong slaying a dragon named “imperialism and national ennui”. With a withering stare.
— And, you know, some erudite diplomacy and a fistful of documents with impressive-looking letterhead.
O!
Comment by Dan Collins on 6/2 @ 6:44 am #
See, I knew all that ugly head rearing would come in handy.
Comment by happyfeet on 6/2 @ 6:44 am #
We’re going down, down, down, if that’s the only way
2 make this cruel, cruel world hear what we’ve got to say
Put the right letters together and make a better day
Comment by Dan Collins on 6/2 @ 6:48 am #
How low
Can we go?
Comment by JD on 6/2 @ 6:48 am #
Watching for mullets is always a good time. Business in front. Party in the back !!! Just be careful around the Camaro-mullets. They are an aggressive lot.
Comment by alppuccino on 6/2 @ 6:48 am #
In Morrow County, Ohio, it’s more challenging to look for “not-mullet”.
Customer: “Can I get my combo Biggy-sized, but not the drink? I only want a medium diet-Coke.”
McClellan: “I don’t know. The manager keeps me out of the loop on that information. I’m flying blind here. Now please pull around to the second window”
Comment by nishizonoshinji on 6/2 @ 7:00 am #
My friends and I would never have dated Scott in college.
He is the archetype of a “Pud”.
ick.
Comment by nishizonoshinji on 6/2 @ 7:01 am #
However, we would have fought over O!
he’s dishy in the extreme.
;)
Comment by Jeff G. on 6/2 @ 7:04 am #
My friends and I would have called him Urkel, and needled him about his ears.
Out of love — and, of course, equality.
In turn, he would have called us Whitey and “AIDS Unleashers.” And we all would have done shots together, and laughed and laughed!
Comment by Jeff G. on 6/2 @ 7:05 am #
But enough! Off to the beach. Where I’ll put on my O! face for the ladies.
Comment by nishizonoshinji on 6/2 @ 7:06 am #
well, Jeff, geek is the new cool, yah know.
the Urkel thing works for my demographic.
its hawt.
;)
Comment by nishizonoshinji on 6/2 @ 7:07 am #
rememer to apply SPF 15 at least.
dont want you gettin a melanoma.
;)
Comment by JD on 6/2 @ 7:08 am #
for my demographic.
What demographic is that? Genodicial eugenecists that think female genital mutilation is alright because it is just a little skin?
Comment by alppuccino on 6/2 @ 7:11 am #
But enough! Off to the beach. Where I’ll put on my O! face for the ladies.
Go easy on the sunscreen. Authenticity is a dish best served blackened.
Comment by Dan Collins on 6/2 @ 7:13 am #
melanoma: it’s black and malignant
Like Mrs. Obama
Comment by nishizonoshinji on 6/2 @ 7:16 am #
nah, JD my demographic are Free Market Eugenicists.
like Jodie Foster and Angelina Jolie and Jen Aniston.
and we do think removing the prepuce is exactly the same as removing the foreskin in circumsion….
because we are, like, educated an all that shit.
;)
Pingback by a-foton » Blog Archive » Another moment of unabashed pragmatism on 6/2 @ 7:17 am #
[...] Ed Brill wrote an interesting post today onHere’s a quick excerptHaving spent part of my morning watching MSNBC in the breakfast room at a Residence Inn in Salisbury — a 20-minute session that included interviews with Tim Russert, Robert Wexler (D-FL), and Dan Rather, along with a lot of proto-hagiographizing of Scott McClellan (at one time rumored by lefty activists to be a closet homosexual and self-hating gay man living a fetid lie, most likely BECAUSE OF THE HYPOCRISY) — I have come to the conclusion that, … [visit site to read more] [...]
Comment by nishizonoshinji on 6/2 @ 7:17 am #
Jodie Foster
Comment by JD on 6/2 @ 7:19 am #
And anyone that disagrees with the nishit is a godbothering anti-science rube.
Comment by panther girl on 6/2 @ 7:22 am #
He’s back! He’s back! :-)
Comment by Rob Crawford on 6/2 @ 7:28 am #
“Educated” is synonymous with neither “intelligent” nor “knowledgeable”.
Comment by SarahW on 6/2 @ 7:28 am #
Send pictures!
Comment by JD on 6/2 @ 7:31 am #
Rob C – Educated means having the ability to type 6-8 memes, in perpetuity, and to willfully ignore all information that runs counter to those memes.
Comment by alppuccino on 6/2 @ 7:32 am #
Why is it taking the gay community so long to distance themselves from McClellan. Do they sleep in on Monday’s?
Comment by Cave Bear on 6/2 @ 7:34 am #
Aw hell. Jodie Foster did the turkey baster baby bit because she’s a lesbian.
Comment by Jeffersonian on 6/2 @ 7:36 am #
Tony Snow, I got…sharp, eloquent, willing to parry with port-side mouth-breathers. McClellan, I never quite understood.
Comment by Texas on 6/2 @ 7:43 am #
my demographic are Free Market Eugenicists.
like Jodie Foster and Angelina Jolie and Jen Aniston.
I would have guessed Tatum O’Neal.
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/article4049265.ece
Comment by JD on 6/2 @ 7:44 am #
Jeff G – Hope your vacation is great. nishit – You should consider a vacation.
Comment by Left-Wing Gaybasher on 6/2 @ 7:46 am #
We didn’t say he was gay. We said he was a cocksucker.
He reformed.
Comment by Pablo on 6/2 @ 7:46 am #
The Audacity of Hick.
Comment by Salt Lick on 6/2 @ 7:50 am #
McClelland always looked like a shaved Ewok to me, but gay, I don’t know.
Comment by B Moe on 6/2 @ 7:51 am #
We said he was a cocksucker.
That seems to be something everyone can agree on.
Comment by Salt Lick on 6/2 @ 7:52 am #
Free Market Eugenicists
Women who sell their designer babies?
Comment by Roboc on 6/2 @ 7:55 am #
Scotty Doesn’t Know
Comment by Lisa on 6/2 @ 7:55 am #
Wait….you are going to be at a bar called the Purple Moose in a leopardskin thong?
Wow. Um….pictures please, sugarbuns?
Comment by Rob Crawford on 6/2 @ 7:56 am #
Free Market Eugenicists
Genocidaires for hire?
Comment by JD on 6/2 @ 7:56 am #
We are still waiting on the links to sugartits, Lisa.
Comment by nishizonoshinji on 6/2 @ 7:57 am #
nah, salt lick.
Free Market Eugenics is optimizing your offspring with best gametes you can get.
Women who make designer babies is more like it.
Comment by thor on 6/2 @ 7:57 am #
#
Comment by Dan Collins on 6/2 @ 7:13 am #
melanoma: it’s black and malignant
Like Mrs. Obama
Personal attack foul! That’s so not Dan Collins best moment.
Comment by nishizonoshinji on 6/2 @ 7:59 am #
aww, cmon JD, you never heard of Free Market Eugenics before me, admit it!
i gtg
Comment by Lisa on 6/2 @ 8:00 am #
#36: I have been trying to find pictures of the original sugartits (the lovely police officer that inspired a drunken Mel Gibson to coin that exquisite word – right before she read him his rights). I have no idea what she looked like, but she must have had a spectacular set of guns.
Comment by Roboc on 6/2 @ 8:00 am #
At least Dan Collins has “best moments”!
Comment by Lisa on 6/2 @ 8:02 am #
#38: Yeah. I am going to ignore that one. It was icky.
Comment by Cave Bear on 6/2 @ 8:02 am #
Comment by Left-Wing Gaybasher on 6/2 @ 7:46 am #
“We didn’t say he was gay. We said he was a cocksucker.
He reformed.”
Actually, to the average leftie, anyone much to the right of Fidel is a “cocksucker”. Only when you see the Power and the Glory of the All Seeing, All Knowing Obamassiah, and willingly Bow Down Before Him, do you lose the cocksucker moniker.
So even though McClellan was a dweeb, he still worked for the E-VIL McChimpyBushitler cabal, so therefore was a cocksucker de jure. What a shame…
Comment by happyfeet on 6/2 @ 8:03 am #
M’chellanoma is completely preventable. Almost entirely.
Comment by JD on 6/2 @ 8:04 am #
nishit – Look inward, young lady. At this point, even Brad Pitt and Derek Jeter’s swimmers would not help you …
Comment by dantealiegri on 6/2 @ 8:07 am #
Jeff,
I don’t know how well you know OC,
but if you like good guacamole, you need to go to Tequila Mockingbird, up on 127th-ish.
It’s in a strip mall on the bay side, past the Gold Coast Mall.
You also need to get there early as they run out.
Comment by McGehee on 6/2 @ 8:11 am #
…in the space of four words.
And I would point out that it was the nishtoon who introduced the melanoma-bashing. What’s she got against black, malignant things?
Comment by McGehee on 6/2 @ 8:11 am #
I’mn sure she just wouldn’t want her gametes to marry one…
Comment by McGehee on 6/2 @ 8:12 am #
But she counts at least one among her best friends…
Comment by happyfeet on 6/2 @ 8:13 am #
vessicles
Comment by JD on 6/2 @ 8:13 am #
Melanoma-ists
/spit
Comment by Lisa on 6/2 @ 8:13 am #
melanoma: it’s black and malignant
Like….
Someone has been talking to my ex.
Bastard.
Comment by Education Guy on 6/2 @ 8:17 am #
It’s a little known fact that in 1977 a young wanna-be rocker named Barack Hussein Obama briefly considered trying out for the recently vacated singer slot in Lynard Skynard, after the untimely death of Ronnie Van Zant. Obama, it is recalled, is said to have been one hell of a singer in the rockin’ redneck fashion and was also “totally into doing mounds of coke with hot groupies”.
How rock and roll history would have been affected we will sadly never know.
Comment by thor on 6/2 @ 8:17 am #
Lisa, I ain’t touching that…. because black is beautiful!
Comment by JD on 6/2 @ 8:18 am #
Lisa – Is your ex a blind a-hole that is dummerer than the nishit?
Comment by nishizonoshinji on 6/2 @ 8:40 am #
hehe, we are all secretly in the tank for O!
except for feets, Karl, and Jeff.
;)
Comment by JD on 6/2 @ 8:41 am #
Yes, if by “in the tank” you mean would not ever vote for him.
Comment by nishizonoshinji on 6/2 @ 8:41 am #
New McCain campaign slogan, courting the black vote:
Black is beautiful, except when its a melanoma.
Comment by JD on 6/2 @ 8:43 am #
Early onset raises its ugly head again. Get help, nishit.
Comment by Salt Lick on 6/2 @ 8:44 am #
it’s black and malignant
Like….
Story headline last year — “Ike Turner Beats Tina to Death.”
Comment by Spies, Brigands, and Pirates - UMBA on 6/2 @ 8:44 am #
We are still waiting on the links to sugartits, Lisa.
Yes, we demand sugartits.
Otherwise the terrorists have won.
Comment by TomB on 6/2 @ 8:47 am #
OK Jeff, in order to do this properly, we MUST see you there.
Here is a webcam that is outside the Ocean Gallery, at 2nd St.
http://www.oceangallery.com/cam-big.asp
Give us a time we can see you there, then, well, use your imagination.
Can’t wait!
Comment by N. O'Brain on 6/2 @ 8:51 am #
“#Comment by nishizonoshinji on 6/2 @ 8:41 am #”
100,000,000 sperm and your’s won?
TANJ.
Comment by Lisa on 6/2 @ 8:51 am #
#55: You’re a great American.
#61: LMAO!!! Titties for Freedom!
Comment by JD on 6/2 @ 8:52 am #
Not just tits, Lisa. Sugartits.
Comment by Lisa on 6/2 @ 8:54 am #
#62: And make sure to wear that purple leopardskin thong with the tatoo of Barack Obama on your ass. You promised!!
Comment by JD on 6/2 @ 9:31 am #
Leopardskin thongs and banana hammocks are just all sorts of of wrong. Damn you all to hell for making me even envision them.
Comment by TomB on 6/2 @ 9:38 am #
Leopardskin thongs and banana hammocks are just all sorts of of wrong. Damn you all to hell for making me even envision them.
The hell with just envisioning them, they could be LIVE, IN COLOR coming to you via webcam from Ocean City.
This could be a brand new direction for PW.
Comment by Mikey NTH on 6/2 @ 10:00 am #
They have a hair metal band playing in Ocean City?
Comment by J.Peden on 6/2 @ 10:02 am #
with the tatoo of Barack Obama on your ass
Only a little dilute Shinola and, viola!
[A thousand pardons, Masters.]
Comment by Peterargus on 6/2 @ 10:40 am #
Are you on vacation in Salisbury MD? The epicenter of the Perdue empire. Back in the day you could catch Frank roasting on the beach in OC with his latest love interest. Good times.
Purple Moose still there I guess places like that never die.
Comment by Michael_The_Rock on 6/2 @ 11:59 am #
The more you drink at the Purple Moose, the more this gets to be your idea of sugartits.
Comment by Michael_The_Rock on 6/2 @ 12:01 pm #
BECAUSE OF THE GAMETES!
Comment by The Lost Dog on 6/2 @ 12:10 pm #
“How low
Can we go”
“Jaques Cousteau?”
There. Fixed that for you, Dan.
Comment by Lisa on 6/2 @ 12:12 pm #
Banana hammocks?!?!? ZOMG!!
That, my friend, is hysterical. In all of my years of discussing and euphamizing Teh Cock or its accoutrements, I have never heard that one.
Giggles and sniggles.
Comment by Lisa on 6/2 @ 12:14 pm #
#72: LMAO!!
I can imagine that they would very closely resemble Brad and Angelina after several beers and a little of Teh Black Label drinkie.
Comment by Michael_The_Rock on 6/2 @ 12:19 pm #
Lisa: From the Wiki article on “Speedo”:
“According to fashion experts whether or not the style is fashionable is often a product of culture and geography. A recent store sales estimate indicated that speedos were the preferred swimsuit for men in Australia (where they are often referred to as “budgie smugglers” or “banana hammocks” or the Grape Cape)
Personally, I had never heard the term “budgie smuggler”. It makes me a bit squirmy, if you know what I mean. Grape Cape is pretty funny, though.
Comment by Lisa on 6/2 @ 12:30 pm #
#77: Grape Cape is delightful. But I truly, truly love budgie smuggler. WTF. I would like to meet the man who came up with that one and shake his hand. Well…unless he has been stroking his pet budgie.
Comment by maggie katzen on 6/2 @ 12:41 pm #
Lisa, here’s where I became familiar with the term. ;D
Comment by Michael_The_Rock on 6/2 @ 12:52 pm #
#79: Thanks, Maggie! I thought of that right away but I couldn’t find it. All right, I didn’t really look for it. But I thought about it!
Comment by The Lost Dog on 6/2 @ 1:29 pm #
“nah, salt lick.
Free Market Eugenics is optimizing your offspring with best gametes you can get.
Women who make designer babies is more like it.”
As in The Third Reich?
And what good do you think the “best gametes” are going to do for YOUR imagined Nazi child?
It takes two sets of “best gametes” to make a “better” baby. But it is good to know that the Socialist Republic of Hitler’s “Mein Kampf” fantasy are still alive and well in your fertile little progg mind.
Comment by B Moe on 6/2 @ 1:38 pm #
One of her links uses Melissa Etheridge/Julie Cypher as an example. If David Crosby is their idea of the master race I don’t think we have anything to worry about just yet.
Comment by The Lost Dog on 6/2 @ 1:46 pm #
B Moe
Yeah. I agree. It’s gonna take a while for that liver thing to evolve.
I wrote a song about David once. It was called “Swollen Liver”…
“…Keep on swelling, liver…”
Comment by Ouroboros on 6/2 @ 2:13 pm #
Dont forget the scent of patchouli.. Your cred depends on the details.
Comment by Pablo on 6/2 @ 2:53 pm #
You mean Mrs. Matthew Hale, right?
Matt Hale, WTF? Gleen!
Comment by Mikey NTH on 6/2 @ 3:01 pm #
Of course, the next thing to do to ensure the success of the master race is to get rid of those lesser races, the untermenschen. The easiest is to just stop all aid, right?
Glad to see matoko is still in character.
Comment by Try Hang Gliding on 6/2 @ 3:35 pm #
Jeff,
If you run out of things to do they are holding the East Coast Hang Gliding Championships up in Ridgely.
Comment by Jeff G. on 6/2 @ 4:13 pm #
Shit. We were down around second street all day and didn’t know about the web cam.
Going to head back for crabs, then take the little one down to the inlet for rides and the like. If I can find the web cam (I used to date a girl who worked at Ocean Gallery, incidentally: Hi, Donna!) I’ll try to be there at 9-9:05.
I’ll be the one…well, staring at the webcam and freaking out the locals.
Comment by TomB on 6/2 @ 5:06 pm #
I’ll be the one…well, staring at the webcam and freaking out the locals.
Just leave your clothes on.
This time.
BTW, I’m staying at the Belmont Towers, between Talbot and Dorchester, in July.
Comment by Obstreperous Infidel on 6/2 @ 5:20 pm #
“Going to head back for crabs”…This phrase used to mean something completely different back in the younger days. Of course, we weren’t so much as going back for them, but at times they may have been an unfortunate byproduct of certain activities.
Anyhow, have fun, Jeff. On a completely selfish note, hurry back and get to posting!
Comment by Lisa on 6/2 @ 6:30 pm #
#79: LMAO!! Excellent clip Maggie. It made me inhale a piece of chicken wing though.
#90: Ha!!
Comment by Spies, Brigands, and Pirates - UMBA on 6/2 @ 6:44 pm #
Michael_The_Rock: It makes me a bit squirmy, if you know what I mean.
Yeah, I used to have one of those critters… mean little bastard, with a razor-sharp beak. Not something I’d want to have anywhere near the Important Family Treasures.
TLD: It’s gonna take a while for that liver thing to evolve.
I think I’d hold out for the Keith Richards model liver, myself. It’d be like an old-school Midas Muffler — guaranteed for life. A normal person could hand that baby down to his grandkids.
Comment by Spies, Brigands, and Pirates - UMBA on 6/2 @ 6:46 pm #
Jeff G: Going to head back for crabs
And I’m betting that the woman in Michael_The_Rock’s sugartits picture would be a good place to find some.
Comment by Michael_The_Rock on 6/2 @ 7:00 pm #
the woman in Michael_The_Rock’s sugartits picture
From maximum affect of alcohol intoxication, the “sugartits” to which I was referring were his, not hers.
Not that there’s anything wrong with that. ;-)
Comment by Lisa on 6/2 @ 7:02 pm #
#93, 94: LMAO!!!
Comment by happyfeet on 6/2 @ 8:23 pm #
I missed the web cam thing. But I got to see the studio get burned up yesterday. It was really flamey and smoky. But the smoke blew into Burbank it looked like. I felt nothing.