Category Archives for Scenes from my driveway
Scenes from my driveway, continued x 56
TweetDeadbeat neighbor: “Is it true the Syrian army is fighting against us in Iraq?”* Me: “I dunno. Who cares?” Deadbeat neighbor: “Well, wouldn’t that mean Syria is, y’know, declaring war on us? That’s kind of a big deal, I would … Continue reading
Scenes from my driveway, continued x 55 (lazy Sunday edition)
TweetDeadbeat neighbor: “Hiya.” Me: “Hey.” Deadbeat neighbor: Me: Deadbeat neighbor: Me: Deadbeat neighbor: “So….” Me: “Yep.”
Scenes from my driveway, continued x 53
TweetDeadbeat neighbor: “So. What’d you think about that Laura Bush speech the other day?” Me: “I dunno. Funny I guess.” Deadbeat neighbor: “Yeah. You can’t go wrong with horse penises, I always say.” Me: “I know. And I’ve repeatedly asked … Continue reading
Scenes from my driveway, continued x 55
TweetDeadbeat neighbor: “Man, what a gorgeous day, eh?” : Deadbeat neighbor: “So gorgeous, in fact, that you probably don’t want to be standing around with me, talking about how gorgeous it is…” : Deadbeat neighbor: “…which would explain why you … Continue reading
Scenes from my driveway, continued x 54
TweetDeadbeat neighbor: “Good morning! Happy first day of spring to you!” Me: “Is it spring already? Wow. Where does the time go?” Deadbeat neighbor: “Well, uh… Me: “– That was a rhetorical question.” Deadbeat neighbor: “Oh. Whew! Thank goodness.” Me: … Continue reading
Scenes from my driveway, continued x 54
TweetDeadbeat neighbor: “Man, when I was out here yesterday in my t-shirt and sandals, I never thought I’d be spending today shoveling 4 inches of snow off the sidewalk.” Me: “8 inches, actually.” Deadbeat neighbor: “No, 4 inches. Just heard … Continue reading
Scenes from my driveway, continued x 53
TweetDeadbeat neighbor: “I’m thinking about buying a cowboy hat. A nice one, too. Fitted. And some kick-ass snakeskin boots.” Me: “Finally saw Urban Cowboy, did you?” Deadbeat neighbor: “Yeah. Oh—and a really huge brass belt buckle! With a pair of … Continue reading
Scenes from my driveway, continued x 52
TweetDeadbeat neighbor: “Beautiful day, eh?” Me: “Not if you happen to have a goiter the size of a kiwi, it isn’t. Or an infected toenail that leaks green pus if you so much as look at it.” Deadbeat neighbor: “Oh. … Continue reading
Scenes from my driveway, continued x 51
TweetDeadbeat neighbor: “If you’d like to stop over later for a few minutes to celebrate the Iraqi elections, that’d be really nice.” Me: “Oh, so you were following those, were you? Good for you! Sure, I’ll stop by for a … Continue reading
Scenes from my driveway, continued x 50
TweetDeadbeat neighbor: “Cold out here today, eh?” Me: “I AM A CITZEN JOURNALIST. I DEMAND PIE!” Deadbeat neighbor: Me: Deadbeat neighbor: Me: Deadbeat neighbor: “Okay. Well, I’m gonna go inside and watch the playoffs…” Me: “HUGH HEWITT IS MY MASTER! … Continue reading
